Monday Night Football in the Vegas Strip Clubs

A Better Way to Choose a Vegas Strip Club

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If you're looking for information on the best strip clubs in Las Vegas, you just hit the jackpot, Jack. You've found the ultimate Las Vegas guide to girls peeling off their underthings in public.

Las Vegas Topless Clubs, Nude Clubs and More

There are 16 topless gentlemen's clubs in Las Vegas, seven clubs where the girls are on stage fully nude, ten casino shows that feature topless showgirls, bars and nightclubs that feature erotic entertainment, peep shows, swingers' clubs, 10 adults-only topless party pools, and a dozen male revues, including one where the guys dance nude.

We've got strip clubs with such an awesome number of drop-dead gorgeous dancers that the scene rivals the harem of the Sultan of Brunei. We've got strip clubs that offer private VIP rooms where you can close the door and get creative with the dancer of your choice.

We've got high-mileage lap dances, nude bed dances, shower shows, mud and oil wrestling, bikini bull-riding, pretty beaver contests, and Monday night football titty blizzards. We’ve got strip clubs that feature stacked dancers, others that feature big booty, and still others that feature 18-year-olds who can fly around the stripper poles.

We’ve even got high-end legal brothels an hour's drive from Vegas.

As a traveling man, I've been to strip clubs in just about every state in the U.S.—including Alaska and Hawaii—and a lot of other countries as well, and I've never seen another town like this one for strip clubs. The best strip clubs in Las Vegas are some of the best strip clubs in the world.

100% Honest Vegas Strip Club Reviews

At Topless Vegas Online, I cover it all. I give it to you straight and tell you exactly what you can expect. If I like a place, I tell you why. If I don't like a place, I tell you the problem. I list the prices for everything, and whether or not I think they're worth it.

Las Vegas Strip Club Costs, Etiquette, Slang and Local Laws

I also fill you in on how to avoid getting ripped off by the tourist traps, and provide tricks the locals use to have maximum fun at minimum cost. And if you're new to the Vegas strip club scene, you'll find guides to Las Vegas strip club etiquette, tipping advice, slang, and local laws.

How to Get the Most from Topless Vegas Online

If you're not familiar with Vegas strip clubs, start with the articles under "Strip Club Survival Guide" at the left. Once you know whether you're looking for a topless or nude club, or some other adult entertainment, check out the "Best Of's" at the top left.

Once you've narrowed down the clubs or shows that you're most interested in, check out their individual reviews for detailed information, hours, prices, and location. And don't forget to check out the free round-trip limo transport offered by many of the clubs. The clubs give free admission when you arrive at their club by their limo, no strings attached. That can save you $70+ to enjoy the pleasures of the establishment.

This Weekend in the Vegas Strip Clubs

Friday, December 2

Sapphire — Las Vegas’ Hottest Lap Dance Orgy (with Porn Star Darcie Dolce)

sapphire las vegas is famous for high mileage lap dances

Jessica Ann Is a Sapphire Gem

Sapphire (club review / club website) is where you go in Vegas if your idea of fun is a never-ending series of nearly naked hot babes in your lap, in your face, and in your hands. If you’re a breast man, at least once in your life, you owe it to yourself to experience Sapphire on a Friday or Saturday night.

With 400+ lap dancers looking for vacant laps, at the rate of 20 lap dances per hour, it would take you 20 hours to get one lap dance each from every one of them. No man has yet accomplished this feat, though many have had a hell of a lot of fun trying. Shouldn’t you go for the record?

Take my advice:  Bring twenties, get a seat, and let the titties come to you. These girls have bods to die for and they are generous about sharing. There’s no sit-on-your-hands law in Vegas.

Darcie Dolce at Sapphire Saturday Night

Darcie Dolce at Sapphire Saturday Night

Newcomer porn star, Darcie Dolce, will be performing on stage throughout the night starting around 11:30. She’ll be available for private VIP shows when she’s not on stage. If you’ve fantasized about getting alone with a porn star, here’s your golden opportunity.

You can reserve a seat at Darcie’s private tables (with a two-hour open bar) for $135. You can also take her into Sapphire’s VIP room for some topless personal attention, or even reserve a steak, lobster and champagne dinner date with her in a Sapphire Skybox for $1600.  You can set up your fun online here (or call 702-869-0003).

You can also get a solo-guy or group VIP package here  starting at $65 (includes a $50 drink card plus a free shot) and enjoy the stage show and lap dancers. All club packages include free admission, free limo transport, a line-pass, a reserved VIP table and the royalty treatment at the most elegant gentlemen’s club in town.  If there’s a particular type of girl you prefer — hot blonde, big booty, Asian nymph, whatever — one of the hosts will be happy to direct your fantasy girls to your table. Sapphire’s club policy is to treat all guests like VIPs. (Your host won’t ask you for a tip, but if he treats you righteous, be a sport.)

Note: Do not take a cab or commercial limo to Sapphire or you will be charged a $35 entry fee. Drive yourself or call for the free club limo. (There’s a $15 reservations fee for the limo, waived if you purchase a buy-1-get-1-free drink coupon or bottle–a no-brainer.)

For more information and a schedule of porn stars to come, see Private Dinner Dates and VIP Dances with Adult Film Stars at Sapphire.

 

Palomino Club — Full Bar, Fully-Nude Dancers & Wildest Stage Show in Town

Reagan Reilly

Reagan Reilly in Palomino’s Red Room

Palomino Club (club review / club website) is the only place in town to go if you prefer to see completely naked dancers while you’re enjoying a drink. At all the other strip clubs in Vegas, if they serve booze, the g-strings stay on. It’s the law. Thank heavens, Palomino Club has an exemption from that law. If you like pussy, you’ll like Palomino.

Palomino features 100+ dancers at peak hours, all of whom get naked on stage in the wildest, sexiest, most over-the-top erotic show in Vegas.  This isn’t just a few babes twerking.  This is naked nymphets in flight around the stripper poles and causing grown men to gape at their sizzling girl on girl acts.

For $100 you can also get any of these girls naked for a one-on-one show in the private, curtained VIP rooms. Isn’t it about time you were alone with a naked girl who isn’t your wife, fiancée, or girlfriend? And there’s no extra bar tab required in Palomino’s VIP. With $6 drafts and $8 domestics for locals and visitors alike, just bring your drink with you and spend your mad money on the girls.

palomino club vegas dancers

Bethany Helping Scarlett with a Costume Change at Palomino Club — The Wildest Stage Show in Vegas

Check out some pics that were shot inside Palomino Club on a typical night:  Pole Dancers of Palomino ClubLilith and Fiona’s Girl-on-Girl Show and TVO’s Dancer of the Month, Scarlett.

If you’re thinking of introducing your wife or girlfriend to strip club entertainment for the first time, Palomino is the perfect place to do it. The dancers are so talented and the stage show so exhilarating that women often become the biggest tippers. The dancers are couples-friendly and they love entertaining their female fans. Add a new level of erotic to your relationship.

Groups of two or more can get free admission to Palomino (a $30 savings for each member of your party) by calling 1.702.327.7258 for the club’s free limo. Locals who arrive in their own cars are free, out-of-towners who arrive in their own cars get in free before 9 pm or pay $10 after, but if you arrive late on a busy night, you may be hit with a tab to cover two drinks up front.  The club also offers packages that are a good deal for couples and groups.

Do not take a cab here, or you will pay a $30 cover charge. 

Palomino’s $60 “Flying Solo” package gets you free round-trip transportation by the club limo, free admission, a line pass and two drinks — or roughly $90 in value. Don’t waste your money on cab fare and cover charge. You can get a lap dance with what you save. (And yes, that’s free round-trip transport.)  (This package is only available Sundays through Thursdays.)

Note: Palomino is a popular club that gets packed at peak hours, so arrange for limo pick-up by 9:30-10:00 pm–or buy a package at the club website–to make sure both a limo and a good table will be available.  Although dancers only have to be 18+, you must be 21+.

 

Hustler Club’s “Chicks and Chaps” for NFR

The National Finals Rodeo is here and Hustler Club (club review) is having some “Chicks and Chaps” specials from Dec 1 – 10. If you show your NFR stub you can get a free Jack Daniels cocktail or a Bud beer. Jack Fire shots are $3 throughout. Topless, full bar, 21+

 

Saturday, December 3

Fetish Queen Rubber Doll Gets Physical with Her Fans at Sapphire

Rubber Doll

Rubber Doll at Sapphire Saturday Night

Tonight Sapphire (club review / club website) features the kinky, busty porn star Rubber Doll on the main stage and ready for action in the VIP. Rubber Doll is a highly sought after fetish model who specializes in squeezing into skintight rubber and latex outfits. Tonight, you can watch her squeezing out of those outfits.

She’ll be performing on stage throughout the night starting at 11 – 11:30 pm, and will also be available for more intimate topless fun in Sapphire’s VIP room or one of their totally private luxurious Skyboxes.

Reserve a seat at Rubber Doll’s tables (with a two-hour open bar) for $135, or reserve a one-hour steak and lobster dinner date and private show with her in a Skybox for $1600. Other packages are available online here. Early reservations are advised. Don’t be shy about asking her for some private fun time. That’s why she’s here.

For more information and a schedule of porn stars to come, see Private Dinner Dates and VIP Dances with Adult Film Stars at Sapphire.

If you’d prefer to just spend the night sampling Sapphire’s uncountable hundreds of lap dancers, helping as many of them as you can to get out of their tops and into your lap, my advice is to get a solo-guy VIP package here starting at $65 (includes a $50 drink card) and enjoy the stage show and Sapphire’s unmatched selection of gorgeous topless girls. Vegas does NOT have a sit-on-your-hands law. Be gentle and generous and your hands will have a fine time.

All club packages include free admission, free limo transport, a line-pass, a reserved VIP table and the royalty treatment at the most elegant gentlemen’s club in town.

Note: Do not take a cab or commercial limo to Sapphire or you will be charged a $35 entry fee. Drive yourself or call for the free club limo. Sapphire’s limos are in service 24/7. (There’s a $15 reservations fee for the limo, waived if you purchase a buy-1-get-1-free drink coupon or bottle – it was $18 or $19 last time I checked, but worth it – a no-brainer.)

 

Viva Vulgarity Burlesque at Boomers Bar

Ricardo Montalbum presents “Viva Vulgarity,” a burlesque show dedicated to being raunchy. Blanche Debris emcees the show featuring Miss May (Los Angeles), Nikita Bitch Project (Japan), Sweetie Bird (Sao Paulo, Brazil), Lolita Haze (The Nymphet of Burlesque) w/Jack O’Hartz, DeeDee Cupcake (Miss Rockin Bettie 2016), SinSity Pearl, Neon, and JP Nomi Malone.

This show is put on by Vegas locals who are dedicated to reviving the art of traditional burlesque.  The dancers range from dishes to grannies, but they all know how to shimmy and tease.

Boomers Bar is located at 3200 W Sirius, Las Vegas. Full Bar, 21+ only. $15 GA, $22 VIP. Doors 8:30, Show 9:00.

 

Sunday, December 4

Vegas Strip Clubs Screening Sunday Night Football

Some of the Vegas strip clubs screen Sunday night games, which, like the big Monday night games, also kickoff at 5:30 pm. Don’t expect the big crowds or free eats, but if you like watching football with topless girls available, these are the clubs that have announced Sunday Night Football viewing parties:

Crazy Horse III (club review)
Deja Vu Showgirls (club review)
Spearmint Rhino (club review)

 

Brunchlesque at Boomers

Brunchlesque – A Winter Waffleland is a show for anyone who thinks the main problem with going out for breakfast is that there won’t be enough girls in the restaurant taking off their clothes. Ricardo Montalbum solves this problem by serving breakfast in a bar and featuring burlesque dancers as entertainment, notably:  Nikita Bitch Project (Japan), Miss May (Los Angeles), Gypsy Louise (Burlesque Legend), Lolita Haze (The Nymphet of Burlesque), Sweetie Bird (Sao Paulo, Brazil), Kitschky Koo, Strawberry Tallcake, Darby Fox, Molly Boom-Boom, Miz Charlamay, Isabella Ivy, Daniel Howard and Rob Steiner. Emceed by Enoch Augustus Scott (from Zombie Burlesque).

Ticket price includes breakfast with scrambled eggs, bacon, sausage links, fruit, pastries, and waffles. Boomers Bar is located at 3200 W Sirius, Las Vegas. Doors at 11:30 am, show starts at noon. Tickets are 22.50. Full bar, 21+

 

Burly-Q Revue at Double Down Saloon

Femcee Miranda Glamour hosts the Double Down’s monthly burlesque bash, featuring tonight:  Auzzy Blood, Dee Dee Cupcake, Krystal Lawrence, and Little Miss Gumby, with music by Johnny Zig and the Highliters. The Double Down Saloon is a locals’ hangout known for burlesque, comedy, novelty acts, hot local bands, and weird drink concoctions. The Bacon Martini and the Ass Juice are two house specialties. The Double Down Saloon is located at 4640 S Paradise Rd, Las Vegas. No cover. 9 pm. Full bar, 21+ only.

 

Bikini Bull-Riding at Gilley’s

If you like cheap beer, shit-kickin’ country music, and girls in their underwear, Sunday night is always fun at Gilley’s (inside Treasure Island). The 11 pm Bikini Bull-Riding contest is actually pretty sexy–amateurs, mostly in their skivvies, trying to stay on that mechanical bull to win money. No cover charge. You must be 21+.
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Alien Cathouse — Review

The Laid-Back, Friendly Brothel with a Sense of Fun

Alexia Rose

Alexia Rose Stretching Out on Her Bed at Alien Cathouse

As Nevada brothels go, the Alien Cathouse (website) is in a class by itself, with the emphasis being on fun. Maybe it’s the crazy gift shop in front peddling flying saucer souvenirs, or the upside-down Christmas tree in the front lobby, or all the extraterrestrial figurines and artwork decorating the hallways and public areas, but this place looks like it was designed by someone with a sense of humor.

This is another Dennis Hof-owned brothel in the Vegas area, about 15 minutes further up Hwy 95 from the turn-off to Hof’s Love Ranch South.

Area 51 Alien Center

The Alien Cathouse — What You’ll See from Hwy 95

The ET-green “Area 51 Alien Center” is what you’ll see from the highway when you get there. Doesn’t look much like a brothel, does it?

That’s because the Area 51 Alien Center is a souvenir shop — also owned by Dennis Hof — that stands in front of the Alien Cathouse. If you like weird flying saucer memorabilia — t-shirts, mugs, ray guns, etc — you’ll like the Area 51 Alien Center.

Alien Cathouse Lobby

Front Lobby of the Alien Cathouse
with its Upside-Down Christmas Tree

Connected to the Alien Center is a really cool 1950s-style diner. This is a burger/fries/chili kind of place with small-town prices and food you can eat there or order in to the brothel. Behind the diner, you’ll find the Alien Cathouse brothel.

A lot of Hwy 95 traffic stops here for gas (there’s also a gas station) and snacks, as this place is otherwise out in the middle of nowhere. Flying saucer territory.

Area 51 itself is located on US govt property across the highway from the Alien Center, sandwiched between the Nellis Air Force Range and the Nevada Test Site, where atom bomb tests were once conducted. You won’t be able to go into Area 51 without risking your life, as there are WARNING signs all over the place cautioning trespassers: “Use of Deadly Force Authorized.”

Alien Cathouse Courtesan Marylin Rose

Alien Cathouse Courtesan Marylin Rose

My advice would be to spend your time safely in the souvenir shop, the diner, and the brothel, which has a full bar and a pool table in addition to the ladies. Unless flying saucers are currently landing at the Nevada Test Site, there’s nothing to see there.

Alien Cathouse may look like it was decorated by a college sorority, but this is a high-end place, clean and comfortable. All the screwball artwork and decorations give it a friendly homey feeling, but the reason you’re there is for the girls, who are some of the most delectable in the state.

Types range from Swedish Bikini Team bodies to pretty neighborhood-type girls you’d be proud to show off to your buddies. The young madam at Alien Cathouse, Lydia Faithfull, is a black-haired, porcelain-skinned beauty with great legs and a wicked sense of humor who happens to specialize in BDSM. (The Alien Cathouse features an “Alien Probe Room” for you guys who are into that.)

You can see pics of the available ladies, or at least those who allow their photos to be published, at the brothel website.  Also at the website, you can find a dozen porn stars who are available at the brothel by appointment only.

The Girls at Alien Cathouse Add Their Personal Touches to the Decor

I Liked the Way Alien Cathouse Girls Add Personal Touches to Their Rooms

Alien Cathouse is located about an hour north of the Las Vegas Strip via US-95 N.  It’s open 24/7/365.  ADA-approved.  Visa and Mastercard accepted (they use “discreet billing”). No reservation is necessary, but call (775) 372-5678 if you want to reserve a particular girl or arrange for car service to the brothel.

For more information on all of the Las Vegas area legal brothels, escort services and massage parlors, including prices, see Las Vegas Area Brothels and Escorts – A Guide.
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Love Ranch South Brothel, Playground of Millionaires — Review

Natasha Mink

Share a Jacuzzi with Natasha Mink at Love Ranch South

Last year, Love Ranch South (brothel website) became the most widely-known brothel in the world. This is the luxury brothel near Vegas, popular among Hollywood and sports stars, where former LA Lakers basketball star, Lamar Odom, almost died after a three-day orgy with multiple ladies of the establishment.

Odom was rushed to a hospital emergency room not because of the sex bender (for which he still owed the brothel $75,000), but because of an overdose of some drugs he had been secretly using during his brothel stay.

Had this scandal occurred at any other brothel in Nevada, there would likely have been an attempt by the brothel owner to downplay the incident, and especially to keep the name of the brothel out of the media as much as possible.  Instead, Love Ranch South owner Dennis Hof, author of The Art of the Pimp and star of HBO’s Cathouse series, used it to let the general public know that there was a brothel near Vegas that catered to millionaires.

But don’t be discouraged if you’re not a millionaire.  Love Ranch South is an easy-going place.  It offers a millionaire experience even for guys going for more normal services.

The Most Luxurious Brothel Near Las Vegas

Love Ranch South Features All Large, Well-Appointed Rooms with Hardwood Floors

Ryder’s Room at Love Ranch South

Love Ranch South is the most luxurious brothel in the Las Vegas area whether you’re there for basic services or for a multi-day orgy with porn stars.

Unlike the small, bare bones, motel-style rooms of most other Vegas-area brothels, all of the girls’ rooms at Love Ranch South are large and well-appointed, with beautiful hardwood floors.  At most other Nevada brothels there’s an extra fee for this caliber of room, but not here.

Ryder’s room (see photo) is typical of the rooms here–large, comfortable, and it even has a tub and shower. (Ryder was one of the girls who was with Lamar Odom on his famous visit here. You may recall she disappeared for a while, but now she’s back.)

There are also more upscale accommodations, because Love Ranch South really does cater to Hollywood types.  The suite of rooms Odom was renting goes for $10,000 a night (and that’s without the girls!).  It includes multiple bedrooms, a bathroom you could get lost in, a private outdoor patio with a spa, and a secret entrance for those who want extra privacy.

Porn legend Sunny Lane works by appointment at Love Ranch South, usually in one of the luxury suites. In fact, you can arrange to shoot a porno at the Love Ranch, with Sunny Lane (or other well-known porn stars), and even cast yourself as the male lead if that’s what gets you off. At the Love Ranch website, you can see a list of the porn stars available, mostly by appointment.

Love Ranch South is the New Definition of a Full-Service Brothel

Love Ranch South Luxury Suite

Love Ranch South Luxury Suite

Love Ranch South offers services that I’ve never heard of at any other brothel.  Not only can you cavort with porn stars, but you can indulge fetishes and just about every combo of sexual partners you can imagine (see the brothel FAQs for more information).

You can check out photo galleries of about 30 of the Love Ranch South courtesans at the brothel website. These are not all of the women who will be available, as some do not want their photos published online. But you can go check out the scrumptious Ryder Cherry if you’re wondering about Lamar Odom’s taste in women. Check out all of the pics–these are some gorgeous women, with a good variety of types.

Bentley Bardot; is Available at Love Ranch South

Bentley Bardot is Available at Love Ranch South

If you spot the kind of girl you’re in the market for, rates here are pretty much the same as at all of the Vegas-area legal brothels. That is to say every lady sets her own rates and the rates depend on exactly what the customer wants (see our discussion of brothel prices and negotiations here).

Love Ranch South has a friendly, non-intimidating feeling.  There is a full bar with neighborhood prices where you can have a drink and relax while you check out the girls.  You must be 21+.  There is a restaurant nearby that will deliver food.

Love Ranch South is located about an hour west of the Las Vegas Strip via US-95N or NV-160 W.  From Hwy 160, you make a left on Crystal Rd and when you get to Appaloosa Lane, you’ll see the now-closed Cherry Patch Ranch brothel. The Love Ranch is a half-mile further down Appaloosa.  It’s open 24/7/365.  ADA-approved.  Visa and Mastercard accepted (they use “discreet billing”). No reservation is necessary, but call (775) 372-5251 if you want to make sure one of the suites will be available or to arrange car service to the brothel.

For more information on all of the Las Vegas area legal brothels, escort services and massage parlors, see Las Vegas Area Brothels and Escorts – A Guide.
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The Vegas Strip Club Monday Night Football Parties Tonight

Palomino Dancer Bambi

Bambi Dances at Palomino Club

Tonight’s Monday Night Football game is a battle between two mediocre teams — the Green Bay Packers (4 – 6) vs the Philadelphia Eagles (5 – 5). The good news is that if you watch the game at one of the Vegas strip club MNF viewing parties, you’ll have plenty of distractions from the so-so action.

If you come to Vegas to bet on the game in a casino sports book, after you get your bets down, go to a strip club to watch the game without having to twiddle your thumbs while you sit through all the commercial breaks and penalty breaks.

What the strip clubs have that the sports books don’t are girls in skimpy outfits looking for guys who are just sitting around twiddling their thumbs. It’s hard to twiddle your thumbs when you’ve got a topless girl in a g-string squirming around in your lap. In Vegas, everything goes better with tits.

Palomino Club (club review / club website) has fully nude dancers on stage during the game. Plus, despite the naked girls, Palomino has a full bar. Despite having nine screens displaying the game — so you really can’t miss it if you’re in the club, Palomino is also for guys who prefer to watch the game out of the corners of their eyes while they’re focused on much more interesting things.

Provided you don’t arrive by cab, there’s no cover charge for Palomino’s MNF party.  The club also serves up a free Hawaiian buffet (meatballs in gravy, fried saimin, garlic fried chicken, teriyaki chicken, and Kalbi ribs). During the game, there are $30 domestic buckets, $35 import buckets, and $8 shots. (If you come in a group, the biggest group gets a free bottle the following week.)

Sapphire's MNF "Party Zone"

Sapphire’s MNF “Party Zone”

Sapphire (club review / club website) has its own way of dealing with the MNF doldrums — the dollar lap dance tsunami at halftime. I know guys who don’t even follow football who go to every MNF party at Sapphire just to get the buffet and the halftime dollar dances. (See my full description of Sapphire’s dollar dance scene in The Best Lap Dance in Vegas).

The buffet? Sapphire’s $22 cover charge includes their buffet (with the best food of the Vegas gentlemen’s club MNF parties–from barbecue, sushi and gourmet Mexican food to salads, and more) plus two drinks. They’ve also got the biggest HD monitors and the biggest, rowdiest crowd. Week after week, this is one of the best parties in Vegas.

Other Vegas clubs with MNF parties are Babes, Centerfolds, Cheetahs, Crazy Horse III, Deja Vu Showgirls, Hustler, Play It Again Sam, Sophia’s, Spearmint Rhino, Striptease and Treasures. For full details on all clubs see:  The Vegas Strip Club Monday Night Football Parties.
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