A Better Way to Choose a Vegas Strip Club

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If you're looking for information on the best strip clubs in Las Vegas, you just hit the jackpot, Jack. You've found the ultimate Las Vegas guide to girls peeling off their underthings in public.

Las Vegas Topless Clubs, Nude Clubs and More

There are 16 topless gentlemen's clubs in Las Vegas, seven clubs where the girls are on stage fully nude, ten casino shows that feature topless showgirls, bars and nightclubs that feature erotic entertainment, peep shows, swingers' clubs, 10 adults-only topless party pools, and a dozen male revues, including one where the guys dance nude.

We've got strip clubs with such an awesome number of drop-dead gorgeous dancers that the scene rivals the harem of the Sultan of Brunei. We've got strip clubs that offer private VIP rooms where you can close the door and get creative with the dancer of your choice.

We've got high-mileage lap dances, nude bed dances, shower shows, mud and oil wrestling, bikini bull-riding, pretty beaver contests, and Monday night football titty blizzards. We’ve got strip clubs that feature stacked dancers, others that feature big booty, and still others that feature 18-year-olds who can fly around the stripper poles.

We’ve even got high-end legal brothels an hour's drive from Vegas.

As a traveling man, I've been to strip clubs in just about every state in the U.S.—including Alaska and Hawaii—and a lot of other countries as well, and I've never seen another town like this one for strip clubs. The best strip clubs in Las Vegas are some of the best strip clubs in the world.

100% Honest Vegas Strip Club Reviews

At Topless Vegas Online, I cover it all. I give it to you straight and tell you exactly what you can expect. If I like a place, I tell you why. If I don't like a place, I tell you the problem. I list the prices for everything, and whether or not I think they're worth it.

Las Vegas Strip Club Costs, Etiquette, Slang and Local Laws

I also fill you in on how to avoid getting ripped off by the tourist traps, and provide tricks the locals use to have maximum fun at minimum cost. And if you're new to the Vegas strip club scene, you'll find guides to Las Vegas strip club etiquette, tipping advice, slang, and local laws.

How to Get the Most from Topless Vegas Online

If you're not familiar with Vegas strip clubs, start with the articles under "Strip Club Survival Guide" at the left. Once you know whether you're looking for a topless or nude club, or some other adult entertainment, check out the "Best Of's" at the top left.

Once you've narrowed down the clubs or shows that you're most interested in, check out their individual reviews for detailed information, hours, prices, and location. And don't forget to check out the free round-trip limo transport offered by many of the clubs. The clubs give free admission when you arrive at their club by their limo, no strings attached. That can save you $70+ to enjoy the pleasures of the establishment.

Gold Club … Closed? Already?

Gold Club Outside2This club just had its Grand Opening in March, after spending a shitload of money renovating. I liked the new look but in my initial review, I listed the SPW rating as “pending” so I could give the place time to develop a customer base.

Last night (Friday) I stopped by at midnight to see how the club was doing so I could fill out my review. The parking lot was empty and the doors were locked. Another victim of the Vegas Taxi Wars.

There’s always a chance the club will reopen with a different format or new owners. I’ll let you know if anything develops.

Strip Club Vultures

A Beginners’ Guide to Birds of Prey

By now you know I like dancers and just about everything I say about them is positive.  There’s so much negative bullshit written about strippers and strip clubs I’m just trying to balance it out. But I’m also dedicated to being 100% honest on this site, so this is a topic that must be covered.

If you frequent the Vegas strip clubs, you’re occasionally going to bump into a species of dancer known as the  “vulture.” The purpose of this article is to help you identify them at a glance, so you can defend yourself from their sharpened claws before they get their beaks into your wallet.

Read More…

Nuns Sue Strip Club

So, the Chicago Tribune reports that the Sisters of St. Charles Borromeo, who live in a convent in a Chicago suburb, are suing a strip club for being too noisy at night and interrupting their prayers and generally bringing down the value of the neighborhood.

Charles Borromeo—for those who were not raised Catholic—was the Archbishop of Milan in the sixteenth century who was canonized a Saint in the Catholic Church because he had women who were accused of witchcraft and sorcery burned at the stake. chi-nun2He had hundreds of people imprisoned and tortured for heresy or practicing the black arts. He is one of the all-time great sickos in the Catholic Church.

So, anyway, this is the “Saint” this order of nuns is named after. And their sensibilities are offended by the sound of rock and roll during their prayers and people who are drinking and one time a Sister saw a condom in the parking lot.

We know what Charles Borromeo did with sinners in his vicinity. But what would Jesus do? Did he ever call the Roman cops to have sinners removed from his sight?

Of course, one might ask who it was who thought a strip club should become a neighbor of a convent in the first place.