Treasures Las Vegas Gentlemen's Club
Palomino Club Las Vegas

A Better Way to Choose a Vegas Strip Club

[]

If you're looking for information on the best strip clubs in Las Vegas, you just hit the jackpot, Jack. You've found the ultimate Las Vegas guide to girls peeling off their underthings in public.

Las Vegas Topless Clubs, Nude Clubs and More

There are 16 topless gentlemen's clubs in Las Vegas, seven clubs where the girls are on stage fully nude, ten casino shows that feature topless showgirls, bars and nightclubs that feature erotic entertainment, peep shows, swingers' clubs, 10 adults-only topless party pools, and a dozen male revues, including one where the guys dance nude.

We've got strip clubs with such an awesome number of drop-dead gorgeous dancers that the scene rivals the harem of the Sultan of Brunei. We've got strip clubs that offer private VIP rooms where you can close the door and get creative with the dancer of your choice.

We've got high-mileage lap dances, nude bed dances, shower shows, mud and oil wrestling, bikini bull-riding, pretty beaver contests, and Monday night football titty blizzards. We’ve got strip clubs that feature stacked dancers, others that feature big booty, and still others that feature 18-year-olds who can fly around the stripper poles.

We’ve even got high-end legal brothels an hour's drive from Vegas.

As a traveling man, I've been to strip clubs in just about every state in the U.S.—including Alaska and Hawaii—and a lot of other countries as well, and I've never seen another town like this one for strip clubs. The best strip clubs in Las Vegas are some of the best strip clubs in the world.

100% Honest Vegas Strip Club Reviews

At Topless Vegas Online, I cover it all. I give it to you straight and tell you exactly what you can expect. If I like a place, I tell you why. If I don't like a place, I tell you the problem. I list the prices for everything, and whether or not I think they're worth it.

Las Vegas Strip Club Costs, Etiquette, Slang and Local Laws

I also fill you in on how to avoid getting ripped off by the tourist traps, and provide tricks the locals use to have maximum fun at minimum cost. And if you're new to the Vegas strip club scene, you'll find guides to Las Vegas strip club etiquette, tipping advice, slang, and local laws.

How to Get the Most from Topless Vegas Online

If you're not familiar with Vegas strip clubs, start with the articles under "Strip Club Survival Guide" at the left. Once you know whether you're looking for a topless or nude club, or some other adult entertainment, check out the "Best Of's" at the top left.

Once you've narrowed down the clubs or shows that you're most interested in, check out their individual reviews for detailed information, hours, prices, and location. And don't forget to check out the free round-trip limo transport offered by many of the clubs. The clubs give free admission when you arrive at their club by their limo, no strings attached. That can save you $70+ to enjoy the pleasures of the establishment.

The Vegas Strip Club Hustle Factor

I can always tell when the economy is taking a turn for the worse, because you start running into a higher hustle factor at some of the Vegas strip clubs.  I recently had to remove a major club from my best-of-Vegas list because on recent visits I had found the hustle factor so bad.

In many of the clubs, you’ll see dancers clustered near the entrance, greeting a new customer as he walks through the entry doors and asking him if he’d like a dance.  That’s fine.  But when they won’t take no for an answer, and start badgering him before he’s had a drink or even found a place to sit down, that’s a problem.

If a customer tells this type of dancer he’s just going to have a beer and watch the show for a while, she’ll tell him she can do a lot better show in the VIP.

If he says he doesn’t have the money for that, she’ll try and drag him to the ATM. If he says his bank account’s tapped out, she’ll tell him it’s only $100. Surely he can afford a hundred measly dollars.

If he says $100 is a lot of money to him, she’ll ask him what the hell he’s doing in a strip club. You start feeling like you’re a defendant in court, being attacked by the prosecution.  If he goes back to square one and says he just came to have a beer and watch the show for a while, she’ll insult him for coming to a strip club without more money.

Underlying Causes of the Vegas Strip Club Hustle

Part of the problem is over-hiring.  Some clubs over-hire dancers because they haven’t yet realized that they’re seeing fewer customers, or that customers have less money to spend. Others may over-hire to compensate for the money that’s not coming in the front door by bringing more money in the back door. Since dancers have to pay the house fee to work in a strip club, the more dancers a club hires, the more money the club makes.

But when a club over-hires dancers to make up for fewer customers, or customers who are spending less, even the top dancers have a more difficult time eking out a profit after paying the house fee, tipouts, and their other expenses. They’re forced to become more competitive, more aggressive, more hard-sell.

The customers blame the dancers for being too pushy. The dancers blame the clubs for hiring too many girls. The clubs blame the cabbies for charging too much of a head fee.

You’re liable to encounter hustlers in any strip club in Vegas, including clubs that rate among the best in town. The problem tends to be worse in the bigger clubs where the dancers pay a higher stage fee, especially the second-tier big clubs that may be struggling to fill the place.

Hustlers in strip clubs walk a fine line. If management perceives that a dancer is chasing customers away, that dancer will get the boot. But some hustlers make good money for a club, so a dancer who’s perceived as aggressive in pursuing customers will be welcome as long as she’s pulling in more money than she’s chasing away.

Vegas has always been a town run by hustlers—a carny town where the tourists from out of state come to drink, gamble, and blow off steam in the strip clubs and nearby legal brothels.

In the 80s and 90s the town cleaned up its image and got rid of a lot of the mobsters. But image is one thing and reality is something else. Vegas has never stopped being a carny town. And when times are hard, the carnies get ruthless.

How to Deal with a Strip Club Hard Sell

1. Come to a strip club with cash in your pocket and only the amount you intend to spend.

2. Never, under any circumstances, should you use an ATM machine in a strip club. The “processing fee” may be as high as 20%.  (That is not a typo.) If you need cash, stop at a bank ATM before you go to the club.

3. Never pull out a credit card in a strip club to pay for drinks before you know exactly what those drinks will cost. Strip club drink prices—especially in the VIP rooms—are not reality-based. And even if you know the price of the drinks on the floor, the prices for the same drinks in the VIP will often be much higher.  Men have been known to sue when they see their bill for drinks in the VIP. But failure to ask the price will not get you off from paying the bill.

4. If you’re on any kind of a limited budget, do what the locals do. Get lap dances out in the main room and avoid the VIP rooms. That’s because three dances in the main room will cost you $60, as opposed to $100 in the VIP or $140 if there’s a required extra bar tab.  At the high mileage lap dance clubs, three dances on the floor is a lot of lap dance.

5. If a dancer is hyper-aggressive, never tell her “maybe later.” This is a polite way of telling a non-aggressive dancer “no,” and a non-aggressive dancer will take off and won’t come around again until quite a bit later, if ever. But an aggressive dancer will only hear the word “maybe” and she won’t leave. Ever.  You will literally have to plan an escape.  And if she does leave, you won’t be free of her for more than 5-10 minutes. You have to tell her “no.”

6. Never allow yourself to be bulldozed into the VIP. If you’re not interested in a dancer, don’t buy her a drink, don’t get a mercy lap dance from her. Tell her you just want to watch the stage show. I’ve never yet found it necessary to insult a dancer to get rid of her, or threaten to report her to management, or take any such drastic measure. Once a dancer knows you’re not budging, she’ll leave you alone.

7. If you go into the VIP with a dancer, watch the time. Depending on how much you’ve had to drink, this may not be easy. But do not overstay the time limit, or you may find yourself being charged. If you’ve been drinking and you don’t trust yourself to pay attention to the time, then tell the VIP host or bouncer as well as the dancer to let you know when your 30 minutes (or whatever) is up.

8. Take your wife or girlfriend to the club with you.  There is a major reduction in the hustle factor when you have a woman at your side, and every major strip club in Las Vegas is not only allowing, but encouraging couples.

9. If your budget is tight and you don’t want to be asked every couple of minutes if you want a dance, go to the lowest-hustle strip clubs. Most of the smaller Vegas clubs have a low hustle factor, but a few of the major Vegas strip clubs also qualify. Here’s a list of Vegas strip clubs, including major clubs, where the hustle factor is lowest (and why).

See also: “How to Negotiate Prices in a Vegas Strip Club”

The Lowest Hustle Vegas Strip Clubs

Topless

Babes: This is a locals club with rarely more than a handful of dancers on any given night. A lot of the customers are regulars. There’s always an easygoing atmosphere. Top-end dancers from some of the major clubs sometimes come here to get away from the hustle. (Full club review)

Chicas Bonitas: A beloved Hispanic neighborhood club in North Las Vegas that serves a blue-collar crowd of regulars. It’s wild, high-mileage, and fun, with all lap dances priced at $10.  There’s just not that much money in the customers’ pockets, but nobody here seems to mind.  Hustlers look for richer veins of cash. (Full club review)

Deja Vu Showgirls: This is a major Las Vegas strip club (one of my best-of-Vegas picks) but it’s a smaller, more intimate club than some of the giant lap dance palaces.  The club treats dancers right, the dancers make good money, so the hustle factor is low and that keeps customers happy.  (Full club review / Club website)

Foxy’s: This is an urban topless club with a local following and a friendly crowd of sociable regulars, male and female. The club has one small VIP room and friendly black dancers. (Full club review)

Sapphire: Sapphire is a premier club  (one of my best-of-Vegas picks) and the largest strip club in Vegas with 200-300+ beautiful dancers at peak hours, but unlike other Vegas strip clubs of its size and quality of dancers the hustle factor is low. I think it’s because the club draws a big enough crowd to keep its dancers happy and busy. A great place to get a lap dance, but also a great place to nurse a drink and girl watch for the evening. (Full club review / Club website)

Nude

Little Darlings: Vegas’ premier nude club with a lot of 18-20 year old customers and lots of female customers. It’s a major Vegas strip club (one of my best-of-Vegas picks), but with an exceptionally low hustle factor, partly because of the party atmosphere and partly because the 60-70+ gorgeous young dancers just aren’t old enough to have acquired sufficient meanness for a hard sell. (Full club review / Club website)

Palomino Club: The only full-time Vegas nude club that serves alcohol (one of my best-of-Vegas picks), with 60-70+ beautiful young dancers kept too busy by customers to have to hard sell. Top dancers here will often ask for (and get) top prices for private dances, but they are generally willing to negotiate and I have never found dancers here to hard sell or be rude. (Full club review / Club website)

Talk of the Town: A small downtown dive with a half-dozen nude dancers, no alcohol, where the cashier doubles as the DJ and drink server. The place rarely has much of a crowd but the dancers are young, pretty and sweet. They’re just local girls, dancing for local guys, and I don’t think it would occur to them to try to hustle their neighbors. (Full club review)

Urban Nights at Lacy’s: A part-time North Las Vegas urban club with a fun neighborhood feeling, not the kind of place hustlers are attracted to. (Full club review)
EndGirl0

 

 

Thursday Night Strip Club Joke

(stole this from Joke Buddha)

Bob works hard and spends most evenings bowling or playing basketball at the gym. His wife thinks he is pushing himself too hard, so for his birthday she takes him to a local strip club.

The doorman at the club greets them and says, “Hey, Bob! How ya doin?” His wife is puzzled and asks if he’s been to this club before. “Oh no,” says Bob. “He’s on my bowling team.”

When they are seated, a waitress asks Bob if he’d like his usual and brings over a Budweiser. His wife is becoming increasingly uncomfortable and says, “How did she know that you drink Budweiser?” “She’s in the Ladies’ Bowling League, honey. We share lanes with them.” Read more…

Two Preachers Arrested at Ohio Strip Club

The never-ending battle between the New Beginnings Church in Warsaw, Ohio and the Fox Hole Strip Club in Walhonding, Ohio resulted in the arrest of New Beginnings Pastor Bill Dunfee along with outside agitator Calvin Zastrow, the Pastor of a Michigan church. Both men were allegedly trespassing on the strip club property Friday night and refused to obey a police order to leave the property. Read more…

A Wild Party Tonight at Little Darlings

Tonight (Tuesday, September 9) at Little Darlings is slated to be one of the wildest and weirdest nights in Vegas strip club history. Script by Tarantino, directed by Fellini, costumes by Fredericks of Hollywood.

To start, Little Darlings is hosting their first ever Pajama Party. If you arrive in your PJs, your admission is free, and since even locals have to pay to get into this nude club, expect to see a lot of folks arriving in their nightwear.

Read more…