Treasures Las Vegas Gentlemen's Club
Palomino Club Las Vegas

A Better Way to Choose a Vegas Strip Club


If you're looking for information on the best strip clubs in Las Vegas, you just hit the jackpot, Jack. You've found the ultimate Las Vegas guide to girls peeling off their underthings in public.

Las Vegas Topless Clubs, Nude Clubs and More

There are 16 topless gentlemen's clubs in Las Vegas, seven clubs where the girls are on stage fully nude, ten casino shows that feature topless showgirls, bars and nightclubs that feature erotic entertainment, peep shows, swingers' clubs, 10 adults-only topless party pools, and a dozen male revues, including one where the guys dance nude.

We've got strip clubs with such an awesome number of drop-dead gorgeous dancers that the scene rivals the harem of the Sultan of Brunei. We've got strip clubs that offer private VIP rooms where you can close the door and get creative with the dancer of your choice.

We've got high-mileage lap dances, nude bed dances, shower shows, mud and oil wrestling, bikini bull-riding, pretty beaver contests, and Monday night football titty blizzards. We’ve got strip clubs that feature stacked dancers, others that feature big booty, and still others that feature 18-year-olds who can fly around the stripper poles.

We’ve even got high-end legal brothels an hour's drive from Vegas.

As a traveling man, I've been to strip clubs in just about every state in the U.S.—including Alaska and Hawaii—and a lot of other countries as well, and I've never seen another town like this one for strip clubs. The best strip clubs in Las Vegas are some of the best strip clubs in the world.

100% Honest Vegas Strip Club Reviews

At Topless Vegas Online, I cover it all. I give it to you straight and tell you exactly what you can expect. If I like a place, I tell you why. If I don't like a place, I tell you the problem. I list the prices for everything, and whether or not I think they're worth it.

Las Vegas Strip Club Costs, Etiquette, Slang and Local Laws

I also fill you in on how to avoid getting ripped off by the tourist traps, and provide tricks the locals use to have maximum fun at minimum cost. And if you're new to the Vegas strip club scene, you'll find guides to Las Vegas strip club etiquette, tipping advice, slang, and local laws.

How to Get the Most from Topless Vegas Online

If you're not familiar with Vegas strip clubs, start with the articles under "Strip Club Survival Guide" at the left. Once you know whether you're looking for a topless or nude club, or some other adult entertainment, check out the "Best Of's" at the top left.

Once you've narrowed down the clubs or shows that you're most interested in, check out their individual reviews for detailed information, hours, prices, and location. And don't forget to check out the free round-trip limo transport offered by many of the clubs. The clubs give free admission when you arrive at their club by their limo, no strings attached. That can save you $70+ to enjoy the pleasures of the establishment.

Nuns Sue Strip Club

So, the Chicago Tribune reports that the Sisters of St. Charles Borromeo, who live in a convent in a Chicago suburb, are suing a strip club for being too noisy at night and interrupting their prayers and generally bringing down the value of the neighborhood.

Charles Borromeo—for those who were not raised Catholic—was the Archbishop of Milan in the sixteenth century who was canonized a Saint in the Catholic Church because he had women who were accused of witchcraft and sorcery burned at the stake. chi-nun2He had hundreds of people imprisoned and tortured for heresy or practicing the black arts. He is one of the all-time great sickos in the Catholic Church.

So, anyway, this is the “Saint” this order of nuns is named after. And their sensibilities are offended by the sound of rock and roll during their prayers and people who are drinking and one time a Sister saw a condom in the parking lot.

We know what Charles Borromeo did with sinners in his vicinity. But what would Jesus do? Did he ever call the Roman cops to have sinners removed from his sight?

Of course, one might ask who it was who thought a strip club should become a neighbor of a convent in the first place.

Club Paradise Closed by the Police (and IRS!)

On June 6, 2014, Club Paradise in Las Vegas was temporarily closed by the police who are investigating a credit card fraud scheme at the club. There’s no word on how long this temporary closure will be, but it’s already pushing two weeks with no word of when the club might reopen. John L. Smith wrote about it in the Las Vegas Review Journal two days ago.

According to Smith, Metro–in conjunction with the IRS–is building a case of credit card fraud against at least two dancers after customers complained of being overcharged by thousands of dollars. Allegedly a witness also claims a customer was drugged.

This sounds similar to the scam that’s been in the news about five strippers at a NYC Scores club who are under indictment for drugging customers, then maxing out their credit cards. I’ll watch for updates on what’s happening with Club Paradise and report details here.

See updates on this story:  “Club Paradise Petitions Las Vegas Court to Reopen” and “Club Paradise is now Club Purgatory” and “Update on Club Paradise Closing”

Most recent update (Nov 10, 2014):  Club Paradise Files Suit Against Former Managers and Dancers

Liquid Lap Dance Pants

Gettin’ Wet in the VIP

Liquid Lapdance is a new type of underwear that’s been specifically designed to make lap dances more “climactic” for men. The product was created by a visionary Las Vegas company that’s been around for a couple years. From the Liquid Lapdance website FAQ:

“Regular clothing is dry, rough, and uncomfortable during lap dances.  Guys may experience abrasions, discomfort, and other minor injuries of the penis during dry dances.”

Read More …

Free Drinks and Hot Dancers at Hustler’s Las Vegas Happy Hour

Checked out Hustler’s Happy Hour yesterday, which runs from 4 – 8 pm daily, with an open bar (free drinks). Went with my wife. Stayed for an hour or so around 5 – 6 pm. The crowd was very light, mostly guys sitting at the bar or tables drinking, occasionally wandering off with a dancer to the VIP, but the atmosphere was congenial. No one acted shocked or in the least disturbed at the presence of my wife.

There were 6-8 dancers, 3 or 4 top-of-the-line, great on the poles and the floor work. Most of the time we were the only ones sitting on the rail and tipping the dancers. It was a perfect scene for watching dancers because with no one else on the rail, we got all the attention. Actually had a blast. My wife bought me a lap dance.

The dancers were really outgoing toward my wife, as they often are to women at strip clubs. (She’s a better tipper than me…)

I’ll do an article soon on going to strip clubs with your wife or girlfriend as more and more Vegas clubs are female and couples friendly. I always have more fun when I go with my wife than when I go alone or with other guys.

I’ll recommend Hustler’s Happy Hour regardless of how you go. They’ve got some truly gorgeous, talented and witty dancers working day shift at this club, even mid-week.